There will be lots of food, fun, and music at the Fiesta. The event is children friendly and special children’s activities are also being provided. The event is sponsored by First Baptist Church in Clarksville.

La Iglesia Bautista Faro de Luz, los invita el viernes 1ero de Mayo a las 6:00 p.m. en el estacionamiento de la Iglesia First Baptist a una noche familiar totalmente gratis.  Tendremos comida, actividades para niños y mucha música.  ¡Los esperamos!

The Amun Ra Theater features a small intimate atmosphere which fosters a personal connection between the actors and the audience. Seating just 45 patrons at a setting, the impact of presentations is moving and irresistible. Neighborhood theater is meant to be like this. As this will be the closing performance for this play, there will be a cast talkback session which will afford the lucky theatergoers an opportunity to discuss the play’s many facets, unique characters and characteristics with the actual performers and the director. A feature not generally available with large scale productions. Drama enthusiasts are strongly encouraged to make plans to attend this moving and tender production. It promises to be a Sunday afternoon well spent.

Directions to the theater from Veterans Plaza:

1.	Head east on Crossland Ave toward Pageant Ln		463 ft
2.	Turn left at Pageant Ln/Plaza Shopping Center		0.2 mi
3.	Turn right at Madison St/TN-112/US-41		3.8 mi
4.	Turn left at TN-76		3.1 mi
5.	Merge onto I-24 E via the ramp to Nashville		36.0 mi
6.	Slight right at I-65 S (signs for I-65/Huntsville/I-40/Memphis)		2.0 mi
7.	Take exit 84B on the left to merge onto I-40 W toward Memphis		1.2 mi
8.	Take exit 207 toward Jefferson St		0.3 mi
9.	Turn left at 28th Ave N		0.4 mi
10.	Turn left at Clifton Ave Destination will be on the left		0.2 mi

Amun Ra Theatre 2508 Clifton Ave Nashville, TN 37209

"Woman getting ready..."

Play dates are funny things.

The morning of, maybe even the night before you set about planning what you will wear. It’s kind of like when you were in high school and were going on a date with a guy, only difference is the debate over what you wear is now a little different.

As a teen you wanted to have it all together, smell nice, hair a certain way, and make- up just perfect.

As a mom on a play date, same thing, only this time you strive to not make it look like you have it all together.

You want to be approachable, right? You don’t want to give the impression that Gucci and pearls are the norm for you. Or maybe that’s just the impression you want to give, and if that’s the case then I think someone needs to tell you

• A. You’re not fooling anyone, and
• B. The rest of us are quietly fuming that you got to take a shower this morning!

So you pick out a cute outfit, a clean outfit, an outfit that doesn’t have any stains on it yet, if you have time you iron it, maybe one piece of fun jewelry, and run a comb through your hair, but don’t check it twice because, remember, we’re going for the whole “child blown” look. (That’s the windblown look for you non-parents)

And we’re not mentioning what your kid has on because we all know that as moms we all are guilty of obsessing way too much over this, so we won’t even go there!

So you’re ready, you’re out the door. You’re on your way to the play date.

You run questions, scenarios through your mind of anything and all that could happen, and how you will calmly handle it.

• What if my child hits?
• What if my child is hit?
• What if they don’t share?
• What if they do?

The Playdate: are you ready for it?

As you pull into the drive you give yourself a quick pep talk, and ok one quick hair check, and you’re off!

If you have the blessing that I had today with another mother and her children than you’re “date” goes smoothly. You relax a bit, even after you send her crystal drinking glass sliding across the patio as you race to “rescue” your kid from toddling toward the garbage truck. You see that she is just like you in some ways, even completely not like you in others, and that it’s OK! You bless each other during your time together and uplift one another as moms, because really don’t we all just want that? Don’t we all just want that extra set of hands in watching the kids while we start lunch, or an extra set of hands helping clear off the table when your done eating, don’t we all just want that human contact, that commodity, that level plain that connects us all as mothers?

I truly think so. So maybe next time I’ll slip on my favorite pair of jeans instead of the pearl earrings, and unlike High School, return a phone call for the next date!

See you on the playground.opinion

We all have a constitutional right to say what is on our minds. Our country was founded on that belief. However, more and more it seems that what someone has to say is not always welcome. In some cases even its forbidden, or even chastised. Who are we to slap a hand or remove a blog, or delete a comment that someone has posted just because its what they perceive to be as right, whether we agree with it or not!

It’s a delicate time we are living in. You must be careful what you say to someone. You must always be politically correct. You must always be conscious of someone’s feelings.

As a parent I quickly learned that every parent has a soapbox of some kind. They have an idea or a theory on the way that they raise their child and they feel very passionate about it. My soapbox tends to be about lead paint in toys. So because of that we prefer no Made in China plastics for Elle-Girl. If you are a parent, what’s your soap box? What do you find yourself defending to the death? What do you find yourself arguing about with another mom in your “Play group”? You see…you do have a soapbox don’t you? I think as parents we must be sensitive to this.

When your child comes into the world you want deep down in your core to give that child the best, to protect that child any way possible and to provide for and just love that child to pieces. Some days I tell Elle-Girl I could just “Eat her face” as I smother it with kisses. (If you’ve ever seen her cheeks you’d know what I mean) Don’t you just know that every parent feels the same?(Sadly some do not, and those are the ones that should have been required to pass a test before becoming parents!) That being said, it should really bother you when you hear another parent condemn another for something they are doing wrong. Don’t you think?

I recently read on a blog about the term Sanctimommy. The definition for that term I believe is: Any mother who sees herself better than some other mother, and feels the undying urge to tell that other mother that the way she is raising her child is not the “correct” way. WHO IS SHE!? I’m sure we have all come in contact with the Sanctimommy in the past. I know I have. Especially when Elle-Girl was an infant and I would have older women come up to me and touch her bare feet, and say “Oh she looks so cold.” In which I had to bite my tongue from saying “Well, I thought about duct taping socks to her feet, so she couldn’t kick them off, but I didn’t think that would be appropriate!”

What I am saying is simply this, please, please, please dear readers, be respectful to others. How dare you for correcting your child for simply staring a minute too long at a person in a wheelchair, then shake your finger at a young mom giving her child a sip of sweet tea. Don’t do it. Think it, maybe. Want to say it out loud, sure! But let a Momma be a Momma and remember this bit of advice as told to Elle-Girl recently:

I found her sitting quietly, shirt up and digging at her belly button, she apparently had never noticed it before. When she looked up she noticed I was watching her she asked,

“Wassat?” pointing to her belly button.

“That’s your belly button.” I said

“Belly buttons are like opinions Elle-Girl, everybody’s got one.”

An April report from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention in Atlanta found that African American mothers, who are less likely than white or Latina women to breastfeed, have reversed that trend and are now doing so in impressive numbers. Sixty-five percent of black women have nursed their infants at some point. This compares to a 36 percent rate 14 years ago. Still, only 20 percent of black mothers reach the government’s target goal of exclusively breastfeeding when their infants are six months old. Breastfeeding can help address health problems that plague both African American mothers and infants alike. Breastfeeding is the most natural and beneficial way to strengthen your baby’s immune system and provide the best possible nutrition for yourself, as a mother, and your baby.

“Breastfeeding has many benefits ranging from creating an important mother/baby bond to ensuring baby gets natural nutrients,” said Pam Noreiko, a lactation specialist at Baptist Hospital.

Baptist Hospital suggests six reasons why women should consider breastfeeding:

1. Breast milk is the most complete form of nutrition for infants. A mother`s milk has just the right amount of fat, sugar, water and protein that is needed for a baby`s healthy growth and development. Breastfed infants are seven times more likely to maintain a healthy weight gain and formula-fed infants. Breastfeeding also reduces infants’ risk of asthma, diabetes, infections and sudden infant death syndrome, all more common among African American infants.
2. Breastfeeding helps form a significant bond for mother and baby. Physical contact is important to newborns and can help the newborn feel more secure, warm and comforted.
3. Nursing uses up extra calories- 500 calories a day, making it easier to lose the pregnancy weight. It can also help ward off obesity and diabetes for which African American women are at higher risk. Breastfeeding also helps the uterus to get back to its original size and lessens any bleeding a woman may have after giving birth.
4. Breastfeeding lowers the risks of breast and ovarian cancer, and possibly the risk of hip fractures and osteoporosis after menopause. The health benefits continue through the next generation: Studies show breastfed daughters have lower rates of breast cancer when they grow up.
5. Breastfeeding makes your life easier. It saves time and money. There is no need to purchase, measure and mix formula continuously.
6. Breastfed babies score higher on IQ tests later in life, especially babies who were born prematurely.

All across the nation, advocates are offering wider education, tools and models for breastfeeding to make nursing the norm among black women. CDC officials are promoting “Healthy People 2010″ objectives that include having seventy-five percent of all mothers initiate breastfeeding and having fifty percent of all infants exclusively breastfeeding at 6 months.

The federal Office of Women’s Health has made “An Easy Guide to Breastfeeding for African American Women” available online. Thus far, 65 hospitals and birthing centers nationwide have worked to earn “Baby-Friendly” status from the World Health Organization and the United Nations Children’s Fund. This designation is awarded to facilities which offer “optimal” lactation support to patients. Such efforts include:

• breastfeeding videos playing in prenatal clinics’ waiting rooms,
• staff members who interact with patients receiving 18 hours of training in breastfeeding basics and lactation consultants meet with every new mother,
• moving infants out of the nursery into the mothers room, and providing free breast pumps to patients who can’t afford them.

Baptist Hospital’s Lactation Department has the medical knowledge and expertise to answer any questions that would help mothers breastfeed successfully. The department can be reached at (615) 284-3381. The Lactation Boutique at Baptist Hospital also offers a complete line of breastfeeding supplies, pumps and nursing bras to make the breastfeeding experience successful. Hours are Monday through Friday, 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. Please call 615-284-MILK (6455) for more information.

Details for this story was drawn from Baptist Hospital’s website media press releases and The Tennessean’s Healthtalk coverage and The Chicago Sun-Times.

The public welfare tradition of government support is a relatively new tradition, started in full force during the great depression of the 1930’s through the recognition of government as a positive force for social change. Since that time, there has been a continuous dialectic between supporters of government as a basic safety net and detractors of government who feel that family is the basic social unit of society, and that government interference weakens the family and diminishes America.
What does family mean to you? On June 15th, 2008 California became the second state in the nation to grant gays and lesbians the right to legally marry. After nearly thirty years of struggle some fundamental rights are finally being granted to same sex couples who are committed to loving and caring for each other in every way similar to those of us who have always taken those rights for granted. For some, this is a step backwards, towards a dissolution of the traditional family unit and the basic moral framework of this country. For others, it is a step forward towards a more liberal and open minded society, throwing off the shackles of an oppressive framework and moving towards a more humanistic and egalitarian vision of community.

Regardless of what family means to you, the law still places strong limitations on what a family is and can do. That is why I propose we take a step further, even beyond gay marriage and beyond traditional welfare standards in our consideration of what family means. In recent history, a family meant a mother and a father, living in a house, with dependent minor children. This basic family unit was the classic definition of postwar American culture. The reality is that this is a very new definition of family and a recent cultural construction. This definition, however, has permeated all aspects of law and public policy and has become the framework of political dialogue.

A more historical, and therefore more traditional definition of family is people who live together in a ‘household.’ What that means practically is that a ‘household’ is a group of people living together and taking care of each other. Sometimes that is a heterosexual couple and their children. Sometimes it is a grandmother and her grandchildren. Sometimes it is two men or two women and their natural or adopted children. Sometimes it is a man and his mother and her nieces. Sometimes it is a group of people who have chosen to live together intentionally. The point is that love makes a family. Whoever lives in a household together and takes care of each other out of mutual love, respect and desire is a family.

This means that public welfare policy and law need to catch up with the times. The cost to the American taxpayers and the loss of productivity and income due to the limitation of benefits is enormous and a real burden on the public treasury. Take the following case as an example of how the current framework of social policy limits who can receive benefits and the burdens that it places on individuals: A man is living with his wife and they find it is time to bring home his mother to take care of her. At the same time, his sister is caught up in a lifestyle of drug addiction and is living on the streets so she gives her daughter to that same family to take care of. The working man and his wife cannot put either the niece or mother on their insurance. In order to do so they will need to file mountains of legal paperwork as guardians, power of attorney and adoption just to be able to participate in their medical care and help them.

In this hypothetical example everyone is related and still they cannot claim these persons as dependents for matters of insurance and other public policy issues. So the only institution to turn to is the government. That is what government is for, but in this case is it really necessary? If we have universal health care and other universal social care policies then perhaps this point would not need to be made. But currently the reality is that we live in a mixed tradition of public and private institutional support with regard to matters of insurance and medical care, not to mention issues of legal responsibility, social visitation and other public policy issues which are part of the current dialogue concerning definitions of family.

A family consists of people who love each other and have made a commitment to caring for each other. I believe it is time for our legislators and public policy administrators to acknowledge this simple truth. Families helping each other out is the most responsible agenda our society can promote. Narrowing the definition of family and excluding some means that the government must then bear the burden or even worse it means that some family members will not get any support or aid in their times of need. This is especially ironic at a time when we are spending hundreds of billions of dollars on a war in Iraq which is using public dollars to destroy an entire infrastructure and government. Our actions in that country have resulted in the dissolution and separation of hundreds of thousands of families, some temporarily and some permanently through death.

That is why I believe it is time to reframe our definition of what a family means. A ‘household’ should be redefined to mean any individual who lives in a common dwelling or property and is actively participating in the caregiving of one or more individuals in that dwelling or property or is the recipient of such care, living in said dwelling or property. This reframework should permeate all levels of public policy from the granting of insurance to the bestowing of rights of visitation to the administration of the ceremony of marriage. We must mandate that employers and insurers offer all family members coverage, and that hospitals and legal authorities recognize the rights of family members to participate in all aspects of their common lives.

Common law family support should be the expectation and the societal norm. Regardless of what our religious tradition may be or lack thereof, the expectation of society should be kindness, charity, love and support. Giving to one another and nurturing is the normal, human thing to do. That is why it is time for our legislators in Washington DC to catch up with the reality of how people are living now and enact laws and public policy recommendations to relieve the burden on families who are already overburdened. As a candidate for federal office, I support the framework and intention of expanding the definition of what it means to be a family and will work to see that such legislation is brought into the public dialogue and made visible to the American people.

In leading up to the list for this monthly magazine aimed at male readers [with the survey actually targeting fathers in search of family friendly communities, researcher Sara Vigneri wrote:

"...fathers face reality when they're not in prime time. They want to raise their children somewhere safe [ed. note: read "low crime"], where they can attend good schools with favorable student-teacher ratios, above-average test scores, and respectable budgets. Plenty of museums, parks, and pediatricians also contribute to a good quality of life, whereas multihour commutes, expensive houses, and divorcing friends and neighbors do not.”

The top “family friendly” spots across the country included Honolulu with school spending of $9000 per student, Madison WI for the high number of pediatricians accessible to families; Seattle WA for its $266 per capita spending on city parks and public areas; El Paso Texas with a median student/teacher ratio of 16:1; Tulsa OK with an average 17-minute commute for its workers; Honolulu, Hawaii for its unemployment rate at half the national average, and its beaches (which is a given — hey, you’re on a island!). Las Vegas, where our city leaders are currently marketing our city to mall developers, ranked 32nd on the list.

Other cities that handily topped Clarksville: Salinas CA (despite its earthquake ravaged landscape, it has made a wonderful comeback); Stamford CT (a nice southern New England community); Boise Idaho with the accessible landscape and college community; Manchester NH; Ann Arbor MI; Oceanside CA, Buffalo NY and more. The “losing cities on that bottom ten included Flint MI, Dayton Ohio, and Beaumont TX. The listing reflects data culled from an evaluation of 257 U.S. cities using statistics and information provided by the U.S. Census Bureau, National Center for Education Statistics, FBI, American Association of Museums, National Center for Health Statistics and American Bar Association.

Readers should also keep in mind that some of these statistics are more than a year or two old before they are compiled into a report that can be used by journalists. Not that it makes a major shift in the issues I now address. The report, which was discussed on the May 19 Today Show on NBC, cited “$6,729 per student, per school year” as inadequate by the magazine’s rating, and that it is a figure the School Department challenges with the statement that it spent $7,494 per student. National databases may not yet reflect that number.

Clarksville’s best resource is its people. It holds a diverse population that includes a high percentage of military families, due to the presence of Fort Campbell. The number of retirees, listed at 8%, is lower than the national average. It is more and more a young family town.

Yes, housing is exceptionally affordable here in contrast to the rest of the nation. Clarksville is a city on the grow, working to attract new business and industry. But it is this unchecked growth that brings with it a host of new problems, especially in terms of the needs of families. Its infrastructure is not keeping up with the pace of development, as heavy traffic and perpetually clogged main arteries prove. Some of the road/traffic design, especially on Wilma Rudolph Boulevard at the new 101st overpass, is sheer lunacy: without reflective aids, a driver can’t even see the marked traffic lines at night and the traffic lights are not aligned correctly with the lanes. Confusion reigns. Ergo, avoid the intersection and its surrounding shopping at all costs/it’s just too aggravating.

Many schools are overcrowded, packed too tightly, and though new school construction will temporarily ease that issue, the unchecked growth in family housing will quickly refill those buildings. Back to Square One.

Clarksville children are isolated from many activities by virtue of distance from, well, just about everything. It is completely unsafe for a youngster (or anyone) to ride a bike along most Clarksville roadways. The lack of bike lanes is abominable. Children living in most new housing developments are completely dependent on mom and dad for rides to everywhere they need to go. More mini parks and pools, please. They can’t even walk safely in many areas due to lack of sidewalks.

One of the biggest ironies in that department is the Airport mini-park adjacent to Outlaw Field, which of and by itself emerged in prolonged piecemeal development; it has a playscape and a pair of basketball hoops set in a grassy nook beside the airport fence, it has a children’s playscape. There are no sidewalks, so access to the park is gained by walking alongside the well-traveled two-lane road that connects Tiny-Town Road and Jack Miller Boulevard. Secondary access comes from walking the railroad tracks that bisect the neighborhood. Many youngsters pass the time climbing the railroad flatbed cars and other equipment stored, sitting dormant, there, virtually every day of the week.

Clarksville has several military-oriented sites, a nice but small downtown museum, a small but wonderful art community, the Roxy Regional Theater (a cultural blessing for the city), Dunbar Cave (a hidden treasure and boon for naturalists), bowling alleys, and quite a few sports fields — most of which require — here we go again — access by mom or dad’s car.

Clarksville does have an exceptional library with good summer programs for children. It has a large computer lab, providing internet access for many city residents. Its growing collection of music and DVDs reflects the diversity of the city and the creativity of the library staff. The Pageant Lane library does have truth in advertising: there is something for everyone there. And it’s on a bus line.

How many times will a family visit the Customs House (apart from special programs)? How many times will someone visit Fort Donelson or other sites and monuments around town? What about the children who are NOT involved in sports? There are few options, so… stay home and play video games? Surf the net? Hang out, bored and ripe for trouble?

The city boasts an ever growing median income, but the job roster is littered with low-paying jobs that don’t meet the living wage criteria for pay with and/or without benefits. When some professional support services offer $10 an hour for master degree’d workers, it becomes a joke. Eight or nine dollars an hour is NOT a good pay scale; it’s certainly not a living wage (neither is the current minimum wage).

Clarksville charges a fairly high price for access to city pools, but once again, most kids require a ride to and from the pool. Some, like the Swan Lake complex, are not accessible without private transportation. They are certainly not within walking distance for most families.

Clarksville’s bus system is good for what it does; it just doesn’t do enough or go far enough. Any city worth a “top spot” rating needs exceptional mass transit. That means later nightime buses, Sunday service, cross-town buses, a terminal (not a WalMart Parking Lot stop) at the end of each major run (i.e. at north Clarksville, the northern end of Wilma Rudolph, and Sango). They need cross town buses that cover North Clarksville, rather than routing riders south all the way downtown just to go north again on the other side of town. More benches and “weather shelters” at more stops would make the system user-friendly.

Drive down Fort Campbell Boulevard and see the pawn shops, title loan companies, the bright blinding neon orange fireworks shop, used car lots, fast food eateries, and WalMart. It doesn’t look good; it’s not appealing to newcomers.

While the high cost of gas is further crimping the family dollar, this “top spot” city is so hellbent on housing and industrial growth that the infrastructure of activities that supports young families has been left in the dust. Each of these tightly packed suburban developments piles cookie-cutter homes on flat lots barren of trees and within spitting distance of each other. No sidewalks, greenspace, playgrounds…just lots of driveways.

Comparing Clarksville to other major or emerging cities across the country leaves the city in a less than favorable light in terms of crime, air quality, and traffic congestion.

Though this survey includes cities large and small, when I make my comments I’m not comparing Clarksville to the big metropolitans like New York City, Chicago or L.A. That’s an unfair contrast. Nor do I compare Clarksville with smaller towns that dot the landscape between the major urban centers across America. Clarksville is a mid-sized city on the grow. From my own experience and perspective, I simply look at what other cities of comparable size have to offer, and Clarksville comes up short. It has many wonderful features, but the scales have been tipped to the side of development profits and tax revenues rather than resources for the people who fuel those profits and revenues.

When the city settled on the “Top Spot” logo, which no one but city officials seem to like, they painted a bullseye over the city, making it ripe for just such comparisons. Without careful management, without an effort to maintain the delicate balance between the job/housing market and the amentities and infrastructure that enriches the lives of the people who live here,, Clarksville will never be Tennessee’s true “Top Spot.”

House Democrats Bring Home Schools First Funding, nearly $184 million in additional K-12 funds expected next year.

This week House Democrats were presented with the 2008 – 2009 projected BEP 2.0 funding numbers which show that, thanks to the Schools First Initiative passed last year, Tennessee’s local schools are estimated to receive $183.2 million in additional funding.

“When we first began the task of improving our K-12 schools in Tennessee, we wanted to do it in a way that wouldn’t put undo burdens on local governments,” said Speaker of the House Jimmy Naifeh (D-Covington). “Thanks to the Schools First Initiative, we were able to increase education funding by over $340 million last year and nearly $184 million this year, while at the same time reducing the pressure on counties to have to raise their property taxes.”

The projected funding numbers are expected to increase average teacher salaries to $39,000, while the burden on local governments to raise property taxes will continue to be reduced. The total percentage of instructional cost contributed to local school systems by the state will increase next year to 71.5%.

“Thanks to the hard work and effort of legislators, on both sides of the aisle, we were able to pass new legislation that allows lower and middle class students the opportunity to see improvements in their local schools,” said House Education Chairman Les Winningham (D-Huntsville). “We must continue to improve our public education system here in Tennessee, so that every child in our state has a chance at the best education possible.”

Expanding Pre-K to All Children in Tennessee Continues to be a Priority

In addition to increasing K-12 funding by over $340 million, lawmakers last year also added over $25 million for additional pre-kindergarten classrooms, raising the total number of classrooms across the state to 934. Currently over 17,000 students are enrolled in pre-K programs in Tennessee, and this year the House plans to expand classes even further with another $25 million in funding, offering pre-K instruction to all of the over 78,000 four-year-olds in Tennessee.

“We expanded college education through the Tennessee Lottery Hope Scholarship, we continue to expand funding for K-12 schools and this year we hope to give every child in Tennessee, regardless of background, the opportunity to get off on the right foot with pre-K,” said Winningham. “Education is the foundation of a successful life in this country and I will continue to strive to make sure a quality education is available to every student and family in Tennessee.”

The House Education Committee is scheduled to discuss education funding later next week.

The movie introduces you to several families that have two things in common 1) strong religious ties, and 2) a family member that is a homosexual. Director Daniel Karslake’s selection of families with different backgrounds is sure to connect with a variety of viewers. Theres a Midwest lawyer and stay at home mother that are Lutheran; a African American couple from North Carolina who are ministers in a AME church; there a Episcopalian elderly white couple from blue collar rural Kentucky (no spoiler here but their child was the first openly Gay bishop in the Anglican church, Gene Robinson); a single middle class mother, and a long time politician Dick Gephardt and his family.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Karslake introduces each family through a historical lens, letting the viewer get comfortable and details the love stories of the parents, their marriage, child birth, and the eventual coming out of that child. The parents and family members frankness is refreshingly honest. We see the story of each family, their struggle, grief, and reconciliation; each in their own way but with all the different views it draws the audience into the families lives like your attending their Thanksgiving dinner.

Intermingled between the life stories of these God fearing families, Karslake sprinkles in traditional Biblical arguments, from Leviticus to Romans, regarding homosexuality. Historians, Pastors, Theologians, family members, and others (including clips from news reels and tele-evangelists) all give their interpretation of the Bible.

Later, the movie analyzes how the Bible is often used to demonize and condemn homosexual behavior. It takes those Biblical passages that are typically quoted to say that God thinks its an abomination, and puts them into the context of the time they were written, to offer a different opinion.

The film reveals how religious families react to their child coming out of the closet. We see their fears, confusion, struggles, and how they focus that energy. We see the difference between having supportive parents versus unsupportive. When the director asked Christians what the Bible says about homosexuality, that they didn’tt know what the Bible says but only what they’ve been told.

I thought the movie was good, and at just over 90 minutes was just long enough. The access to the families is intimate and compelling. The historical references to the Bible were informative. For those who are well read, there probably isn’t anything new here. The power in the film lies with the families’ individual stories that really draws the viewer into their story with a fresh perspective.

I encourage you to check out the film and make your own decision.

About the Movie

Can the love between two people ever be an abomination? Is the chasm separating homosexuals and Christianity too wide to cross? How can the Bible be used to justify hate? These are the questions at the heart of Daniel Karslake’s FOR THE BIBLE TELLS ME SO. A World Premiere in competition at the 2007 Sundance Film Festival, FOR THE BIBLE TELLS ME SO was also honored with Audience Awards at the 2007 Seattle and Provincetown International Film Festivals and The Kathleen Bryan Edwards Award for Human Rights at the 2007 Full Frame Documentary Film Festival. This provocative, entertaining film concisely reconciles homosexuality and a literal interpretation of Biblical scripture.

Through the experiences of five very normal, very Christian, very American families — including those of former House Majority Leader Richard Gephardt and Episcopal Bishop Gene Robinson — we discover how people of faith handle, or sometimes tragically fail to handle, having a gay child. Informed by such respected voices as Bishop Desmond Tutu, Harvard’s Peter Gomes, Orthodox Rabbi Steve Greenberg and Reverend Jimmy Creech, FOR THE BIBLE TELLS ME SO offers healing, clarity and understanding to anyone caught in the crosshairs of scripture and sexual identity.

Some of what we hear from the Theologians

Reverend Dr. Laurence Keene, Disciples of Christ:

“When people ask questions about homosexuality, almost always they follow with, ‘and what does the Bible really say about it?’”

“When the term ‘abomination’ is used in the Hebrew Bible, it is always used to address a ritual wrong – it never is used to refer to something innately immoral. Eating pork was not innately immoral for a Jew, but it was an abomination because it was a violation of a ritual requirement.”

“I have a soft spot in my heart for literalists because I used to be one. However, when someone says to me ‘this is what the Bible says,’ my response to them is, ‘No, that’s what the Bible reads.’ It is the struggle to understand context and language and culture and customs that helps us to understand the reading, or what it is saying.”

“There’s nothing wrong with a fifth grade understanding of God, as long as you’re in the fifth grade.”

“There is no ability to procreate when you engage in homosexual behavior, so it was a violation of a cultural norm. [This was] the sin of Onan in the Old Testament, where Onan is sentenced to death because he ejaculates out of the woman’s body, so his partner doesn’t get pregnant. As the King James Version says, ‘Onan spills his seed upon the ground, and God strikes him dead.’ It was ritually impure. It was an abomination.”

Reverend Peter Gomes, Harvard:

“There are about 6 or 7 verses in all of Scripture that speak to even remotely what we might call homosexual activity or homosexual conduct.”

“[Literalists] are failing to read the Bible within the context of its authors and of its original culture.”

Reverend Steven Kindle, Clergy United:

“In this particular one, it’s Leviticus Chapter 20, Verse 13, it says if a man lies with a male as with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination, they shall be put to death, their blood is upon them – if you read the Bible on a face value level, that reading disregards several very important things: the first one is just a few verses before that Moses teaches in Leviticus that it is an abomination to eat shrimp….It is an abomination to eat a rabbit.”

Rabbi Brian Zachary Mayer:

“A few verses above and below it says you shouldn’t plant two different seeds in the same hole, you shouldn’t commingle your crops… There is other text that says you shouldn’t wear linen and wool together. To just pick out, this is the one that we’re going to follow…the Bible doesn’t come that way – it’s selective reading…Those Biblical laws, they’re known as the Holiness Code. They were laws that were supposed to help people at that time find holiness in their lives.”

Reverend Susan Sparks, American Baptist Church:

“To me that’s the important thing to recognize: the historical context in which this was written. That particular section on a man not lying with a man goes to procreation. It is about a nation trying to grow. At the time, the Hebrew people understood that male seed was actually all of nascent life contained right there – women had nothing to do with actually the birth except for just incubation, so that particular section was about saving seed, saving seed only to procreate so the nation could grow.”

Revered Mel White, Soulforce:

“When I was on Larry King Live, somebody called in and said, ‘What do you guys do in bed?’ Larry hung up on him and said, ‘that’s none of your business.’ And I said, ‘We’ve been together in the same bed for 24 years – we’re like everybody else, we sleep in bed. And King said: ‘Once they find out you’re as boring as we are, it’s all over.’”

“Now it (the Bible) is being used, misused, to condemn gay people – it’s an old trick. Fundamentalist Christians have been using it throughout the ages, and now they’re doing it again.”

Archbishop Desmond Tutu, Nobel Peace Prize Laureate:

“The Bible is the word if God through the word of human beings, speaking in the idiom of their time, and the richness of the Bible comes from the fact that we don’t take it as literally so that it was dictated by God.”

Some of what we hear from the families

The Gephardt Family

Chrissy Gephardt: “Growing up in the Catholic Church, it was never something that I heard explicitly, but I definitely knew that that was part of the Bible and in fact, there were two things that I remember were an abomination: homosexuality and suicide. And I’ll never forget thinking that ‘Oh my gosh, you can never commit suicide because you’re going to go to hell and you can never be gay because you’re going to go to hell.’”

Dick Gephardt: We thought she was…

Jane Gephardt: She was always a jock.

Dick Gephardt: She was athletic

Jane Gephardt: She was good, too. She was a good athlete.

Dick Gephardt: She was a good athlete – she also wore pants more than skirts and dresses

Jane Gephardt: But that was because she was trying to be like Matt, like her older brother

Dick Gephardt: We thought that, but…

Jane Gephardt: Well that’s what we thought, and I still think that…

The Robinson Family

Isabella “Boo” McDaniel (Bishop Gene Robinson’s ex-wife): “I was just glad to be there for the consecration, because I thought by my presence I could really show that I was supportive. I mean, there was just huge security, Gene had a bullet proof vest under his vestments and I realized how scary it must have been for him.”

Bishop Gene Robinson: “My parents are probably the two best Christians I know and they don’t do it because they ought to do it, they just do it because it’s who they are. So to have them presenting this [the consecration vestments] to me – it’s just kind of a coming out for them as well. They’re all of a sudden just completely light hearted and relieved about this and are able to be proud.”

The Reitan Family

Jake Reitan, activist: “I remember very distinctly when I was a kid when I first learned that so much of the world wasn’t Christian – and that just kind of blew my mind – because I was of the perspective that everyone is Christian because everyone wanted to go to Heaven, you know, and then I learned that only one third of the world was Christian and I thought to myself: are that many people going to Hell?”

“I remember one Sunday where my pastor preached on homosexuality and it wasn’t in the best of light, but I didn’t want to question because I knew that the answers wouldn’t be good.”

The Poteat Family

David Poteat: “I had good kids. We had one of each sex – when my kids were growing up, I said ‘God, please don’t let my son grow up to be a faggot and my daughter a slut.’ And he did not. He did not do that. He reversed it.”

Brenda Poteat: “I can’t say where in the scheme of things that I saw this talk show [the Phil Donahue show] and I realized that what I was embarrassed about was that I was thinking totally of how she was having sex and not about her as a person. When I saw the talk show with two guys — buff, good looking guys — and they were asked the question ‘which one of you guys takes on the female role in the relationship’ and they said ‘neither one of us, we are attracted to men, if we were attracted to women, we’d be with women.’

“I’m sitting there thinking, but what about the ones that twist their butts and act like women, what are they attracted to? Who are they? And I’m thinking ‘but that’s all you’ve ever seen.’ That’s what comes to mind when you hear ‘homosexual’: you think of the girlfriend-acting fellow, the butch dykey-acting woman. You don’t think about everyday people, and there are ‘everyday people’ who are gay, and you’re thinking about how they’re having sex.

“I had to realize that she was my daughter: she had the same personality, she enjoyed the same things that she did before I knew she was gay. Then I had to stop thinking about Tonia that way. Although I still do not approve of the lifestyle, it was a big burden off me, that I could relate to her better and I stopped trying to push her.”

Awards

For more information

Visit the official movie web site at http://www.forthebibletellsmeso.org/

About First Run Features

First Run Features was founded in 1979 by a group of filmmakers to advance the distribution of independent film. Under the leadership of the late independent film pioneer, Fran Spielman, First Run Features quickly gained a reputation for its controversial catalog of daring independent fiction and non-fiction films. Today First Run remains one of the largest independent theatrical and home video distributors in the United States; its legacy includes films by such notable directors as Spike Lee, Michael Apted, Jane Campion, Ross McElwee, Michael Winterbottom, Sven Nykvist, Peter Jackson, Dariush Mehrjui, David O. Russell, Lizzie Borden, Claude Chabrol, Jan Svankmajer, Peter Watkins, Radley Metzger, Victor Nunez, the Quay Brothers, Kim Ki-Duk and Satyajit Ray.

For more information, or to browse their many other films, visit their web site at: http://www.firstrunfeatures.com/

Grandfather, lean, lanky, tall and bony, had muscles of steel from haying. plowing, chopping wood and milking cows daily. He worked diligently from sunrise to sunset. He had no electricity or indoor plumbing, and water for the household was carried in buckets from the spring at the bottom of the hill, up about 200 feet to the house. Though he had a good wife, Maggie, and eight children, he himself was constantly at work with farm chores, sometimes helped by hiring out a neighbor for 50 cents a day.

Grandfather’s medical care was given a low priority in his available resources. The farm produced only a meager income . For every ear of corn grown on his 40 acres, there were 10 rocks to be cleared. The land actually produced more useless rocks than corn. There was no such thing as “rock sou” in the Ozarks. The years of survival and stress took a toll on his health and at age 70 he was diagnosed with pneumonia; this disease without medication caused untold suffering and hardship. It caused the death of my grandfather, a man I respected and loved. For two years he took the role of father when I lived with them during the first two years of my life. In a way, I was his son and became his child as my single mother worked in a shoe factory in a town 25 miles away.

As the disease ravaged him, he moved to town to live with one of his sons, my Uncle Frank. The last time I saw him alive he was resting on a couch. His children did what they could to financially and morally support him. Grandfather was an honest moral, person.

Recently in my reading on the Civil War I was introduced to a new word: Atavistic, meaning the appearance of a physical attitude in a person that was found in an ancestor, relative or significant person.I believe that besides genetic traits, I carry a few of my grandfather’s characteristics. As I age I become more sensitive to his contribution to my life.

Within a year, grandmother packed her meager belongings and moved to town (Rolla, MO) He children assisted her in loading and unpacking the dozen quilts she made with scraps of brightly colored cloth The bought her a small house for $1,800, near her caring children. She made the diminutive place a sanctuary for her grandchildren. Unfortunately, she passed while I was attending seminary in 1961.

I remember my grandparents being cared for and provided for by their children. This is a situation many of us must confront: how to care for aging parents.

“Moving a parent into your home” is an illuminating article I read recently in Money Advisor (February 2008). This is one course of action open to an adult who parent totheir parent.

To make such a life changing decision, though, merits remembering what they have done for us. Our fond memories of how they kept us safe and protected, and sacrificed for us in our childhood will give us the motivation to care for them. Currently, this is a heated discussion. It’s time to give attention to caring for parents and assuring that their needs are met.

We are living in the sandwich generation. On this day, 34 million of our fellow citizens care for an aging parent of relative because of health problems and the devastation caused by mental downgrading. There are times when kit is practical to a share a home with parents. I praise my sister, Sharon, for unselfishly giving a home to my mother before her death in March.

What follows are suggestions on the subject of caring for a parent, especially if that parent is to move into your home. A comprehensive discussion of this subject is found in Money Advisor, 2.08, pg 10. A copy of this back issue is available for $5.00 from CRMA, 101 Truman Ave., Yonkers, NY 10703. This is one of my favorite periodicals.

Here are areas to research before bringing a parent into your home. Such decisions made out of affection and a sense of responsibility still require guidelines.

• Evaluate the situation legally to protect the parent’s legal rights and yours as well. Before the move, negotiate with siblings on expectations of what they’ll contribute monetarily and in personal time. It’s wise and worth the cost to have an official written document by an attorney of the commitment. Don’t settle for a verbal understanding or handshake for this agreement.

• Evaluate your situation financially. There are tax deductions when contributing to the support of a parent’s expenses. Also, remodeling to your home for a parent could be a tax deduction. It is critical, too, to research the options available for investing the parent’s assets. A financial adviser for a reasonable fee can suggest a conservative low risk portfolio.

• Evaluate the situation in terms of lifestyle. With certainty, your life will change when a parent moves in. The parent will have physical and psychological needs and may be dependent on you for transportation. The deserve privacy too. Make plans for their bedroom, television and bathroom. The room needs to be as spacious as possible. It make require remodeling, but it is worth the expense in the long run. Even the carpeting is to be analyze. Commercial grade carpeting is easier to clean and easier to maneuver with walkers and wheelchairs. Avoid scatter rugs and shag or heavily piled carpets. Berbers are a good choice.

• Evaluate the needed services. Changes in mental or physical health may require assistance that the family cannot provide. At some point it will be necessary to have a home care aide to assist a parent with bathing, dressing and other needs. My friend and a deacon of our church benefited from such an arrangement. Because of their low income, they received help through the state of Missouri. Adult day care can be a Godsend, reducing the number of hours of care the parent requires from family. Include the parent in entertaining activities and family events, and try to sustain active involvement in a church fellowship. Just as child care care blossomed through churches, and became an essential mission, perhaps the best care will be in a church day care program.

• Evaluate your personal needs. The addition of a parent to the family and home will perpetuate changes, influence lifestyle and impact emotions profoundly. An effective caregiver must preserve their own well-being before they can provide a healthy environment for a parent. Make time for yourself. Resume exercising, attend church and social activities, talk a walk with a friend, or have lunch or a cup of coffee out. It will rejuvenate you. Reserve time for your own family and include the parent in activities.

Caring for a parent in your home is a challenge. It has its benefits and its problems, but the problems can be minimized and worked through by the caregivers.Understanding the meaning of “tough love” is helpful when an adult child become the parent. The advice given for effective communication between a parent and child are applicable as well when you begin parenting your parents in later life.

As I reflect on this narrative, I am analyzing my own situation. At age 70, I recognize at least cognitively that my daughter may at some point be a caregiver for me. My children are spread out, and I hope I never have to make such a dramatic change. I am meditating on this possibility and have one option that is appealing to me: as the BoyScouts say, “Be prepared.”

Last fall, there was an article in the Leaf Chronicle [10.12.07] titled, Fort Campbell General stresses suicide prevention. It reported that with nine suicides for the year, and 16 deaths pending investigation, and with three suicides in the last two weeks, the general said:

“This is unacceptable and it must stop. I want everyone associated with Fort Campbell to take pause, and to focus on what we can do as a community to reverse this trend.”

According to the Fort Campbell Courier, [12.20.07 vol. 43, no. 51], Maj. Gen. Jeffrey Schloesser, Commanding General at Fort Campbell, made suicide prevention his priority since he took command in 2006. He expanded the “buddy care” program, which has soldiers watching out for each other, to “unit watch,” a program used by commanders when a soldier has suicidal thoughts. Now he is training families to recognize signs through “Building Family Resiliency” programs. He was quoted as saying:

“The individual has got to take personal responsibility. They have got to take responsibility for themselves and realize that they can save their own lives. It comes back to the individual.”

An army wife spoke out about these articles and about what was going on at the base because of the suicide scares. This is her view, in her words:

I only became aware of these “programs” when there was apparently an increase in suicides in the November/December time frame.

At first I thought they had to be kidding.

The approach seemed to be such a knee jerk reaction and was basically like a lockdown. It seemed to be good for command but not for soldiers or families. It was said by a few soldiers that it had even been discussed to simply move all the soldiers on post until they left for deployment. A 75 mile radius without approved leave was instated.

My husband suddenly had to do two formations a day — am and pm. If his commander was not present they had to wait for the commander to show up — so sometimes they’d be waiting around for hours.

So during that last month together we felt the grip tighten and it was very uncomfortable in terms of having reasonable last weeks as a family. Deployment is hard enough without adding this type of stress. It was highly dysfunctional. There was nothing official given to the family. To my knowledge we were not addressed at all.

I remember thinking how reactionary this was, and how anyone with any sense at all in a management or leadership level should consult with psychiatric professionals on the matter. I do not believe this ever happened.

The reaction was so harsh to all of the soldiers and their families that it is a miracle it didn’t cause further damage in suicide rates. It certainly heightened the stress levels. It was so obvious a cover-yourself-paper-trail reaction. It felt like the command was incensed that these soldiers would do this (suicide) on their watch.

I never saw any concern as to the WHY or the CAUSE of this increase. It is no secret that this command has been less than supportive of its people. When I did a scant amount of research and found further documentation that this leadership places full responsibility for soldiers not being able to cope with deployment stress squarely on the shoulders of those soldiers, I was furious and disgusted.

The increase in deployment rotation no longer allows for families and soldiers to readjust fully and complete the emotional deployment cycle before they re-enter the next deployment cycle emotionally.

So the fact that this type of stress and reaction is placed solely at the soldier’s feet is absolutely wrong. I also find absolute absurdity and irony in the idea of “battle buddy” as prevention to suicide — especially if the soldier is to take responsibility for himself and his own actions. People who are at the level of being suicidal aren’t going to call some randomly assigned “buddy” to help them through it. Besides, they hand these soldiers weapons and these soldiers handle multi-million dollar equipment, but they need to be assigned a battle buddy to prevent them from killing themselves? I would certainly love to see the psychiatric basis for any of these decisions as well as the considered psychological impact on the family.

Do I feel like this command gave a damn about these soldiers or their families? Not at all. I think this command was concerned with the professional and political impact this (suicide rates) would have on their individual career. Is that a strong opinion-you bet it is!

What really amazes me is that this problem was bad enough to put these high level restrictions on our lives but not one single news outlet picked this up. The media should be ashamed if they knew and said nothing. I’ve heard rumors that this has been one of the worst years at Fort Campbell ever and that it’s possibly the worst rate Army wide.

But who’s to tell-none of the numbers are being released-just those of us going on with our daily lives being basically punished because some commander is furious that soldiers are so depressed that they have felt it necessary to resort to suicide.

My husband told me the way they assess risk is with a standard question matrix that they all had to submit to. A spreadsheet isn’t going to tell you accurately who is truly at risk. What is overwhelming emotionally to one person may be not a big deal to another. If “this must stop!” then why not bring in professionals? They have the access to them but they are too concerned with their career to do the right thing. It’s easier to blame the victim.

Someone once said “The first sure sign of lack of control is over-control.” How is it no one seemed to notice something was so desperately wrong over at Fort Campbell and so obviously out of control? Where are our representatives and our senators? Where are the reporters? Why did no one seem to notice this thing?

Local therapist responds …

Polly Coe, a Clarksville-based mental health therapist working with troops, said she has heard such comments,concerns and frustrations many times over. Coe writes:

I have heard comments just like the ones of the soldier’s wife quoted many times over, and I quite agree with her. The buddy approach is a farce. Understandably, the Army tends to suspect suicidal ideation as a means to get out of deployment. However, it is ignoring the clear fact that suicides are increasing and is not looking at why.

Between the second and recent third deployments, many soldiers I saw did not want to go on the next deployment. Primarily, they did not want to be gone from their families that long – e.g.:15 months. But even some of the Special Forces guys, who have shorter but more frequent rotations, have also expressed frustration at the inability to have a decent family life.

I have not worked with any suicidal soldiers. However, a couple seriously discussed harming themselves to avoid deployment. Relatively few of the enlisted soldiers and NOC’s whom I saw “believe in” these wars, although officers tend to buy into the wars more. Many of the enlisted soldiers do not seem to think that they are fighting for freedom or against the terrorists. They feel that their efforts are wasted, that they are risking their lives to do missions that will be undone the minute they turn their backs or go to the next town.

The soldiers with families are also aware of the impact their absence has on their families. Starting last summer, before the third deployments, I started seeing a lot of boys, age 10-14, sons of soldiers, who confided in me that they feared that Dad wouldn’t survive the third deployment, that he will finally be killed. I couldn’t promise them that their dad would make it, so this was heart breaking work as a therapist.

I would love an honest survey of the military who have to fight in Iraq and Afghanistan – how many believe that they are making a difference, improving the lives of the locals, saving the U.S. from terrorists? How many would volunteer to go? Perhaps the reason for the increased suicidality is the increasing disillusionment of the soldiers with the war.

Coe has frequently spoken out about the impact the war and multiple extended deployments has had on soldiers and their families across the country.

Unfortunately, this means Tennesseans often have to rely on news media sound bytes to obtain information about the candidates. However, since news media are businesses and therefore have as their proper goal the making of money, this often leaves viewers with precious little information about how the candidates would actually go about running the county and a disturbing amount about their private lives.

Let’s be honest, does it really matter than Barrack Obama has an Islamic heritage, that Hillary didn’t leave Bill, that Mitt Romney is Mormon or that John McCain allows his adult children to live their own lives?

With this in mind, the author has put together a series of articles about how the candidates stand on some of the hottest issues of today, from abortion to the Iraq war. With that in mind, there are a few necessary disclaimers. First, the author wishes to acknowledge his indebtedness to OnTheIssues for doing most of the leg work for these articles. Despite their sometimes apparent bias, their repository includes sources for its statements that allowed for easy backtracking to the original source to produce the truth. Secondly, the author wishes to note that the opinions and interpretations of the candidates and their stances on the issues are his own and do not necessarily reflect the position of Clarksville Online, its publisher, or any other member of its staff. Further, the author realizes that he has not included analysis on every possible candidate and at no point intends to do so.

An issue that has become recurring throughout recent political cycles has been that of abortion, with people holding positions from outright bans in all circumstances to completely unregulated abortion. Most politicians do not hold such extreme positions as a matter of political necessity, but there is a wide range in positions among the candidates in this election cycle. Generally Democrats are painted as supporting abortion while Republicans are stereotyped as being staunchly anti-abortion. However, the truth is that these labels are not entirely correct in the current field.

Barrack Obama surprised many with his victory in the Iowa caucuses. How does he feel about abortion, though? Obama believes very strongly in the woman’s right to choose. As the junior senator from Illinois, Obama voted against the partial birth abortion ban. Senator Obama also voted against the bill that would require parental notification for minors seeking abortions outside their home state. Obama advocates age appropriate sex education that includes information about family planning and contraceptive use. Senator Obama says he believes that women should be trusted to make their own decisions regarding abortion, but he also says that he extends the presumption of good faith to abortion protestors. Overall then, Barrack Obama has a very permissive attitude towards abortion in line with the hardcore liberal stance.

Hillary Clinton was the front-runner up until the first primary but had a very disappointing finish there. Mrs. Clinton has a somewhat more centrist view of abortion than Senator Obama that has changed somewhat over the years. Clinton’s failed 1993 national health care plan included the legality and widespread availability of RU-486 and traditional abortion procedures. She has also labored strongly to have the Contraceptive Plan B (the so-called “Morning After Pill”) placed on the market.

Clinton, however, has some consistency problems. Senator Clinton indicates that she supports the banning of late term abortion, but she voted against the Partial Birth Abortion Ban that included provisions for the life of the mother. Clinton also claims to support parental notification for minors seeking abortion, but she voted against that bill too. The Senator did, however, vote for a bill that would fund sex education including information on family planning. Clinton says she believes abortion should be safe, legal and rare. She supports the Cairo document, which claims abortion is a right but not a tool for family planning. Overall, Senator Clinton’s words would suggest someone with a more populist view of abortion supporting reasonable restrictions. However, her voting record is somewhat at odds with this and suggests that in practice she adheres more closely to the liberal line.

Former Arkansas Governor Mike Huckabee kicks off the Republican side of the issue. Huckabee staunchly opposes abortion in any form. He says that states rights do not exist for moral issues such as abortion. The Governor says that he would ban all abortion if able and that no consensus with pro-choice advocates is possible as he believes that they want a fundamentally different world from pro-life advocates. Huckabee was part of the leadership that led Arkansas to passing a Human Life amendment to the state constitution expressly stating that life begins at conception.

Huckabee believes that it will be a good day for America when (not if) Roe v. Wade is overturned and until then, he has stated there should be no tax dollars for organizations that fund abortion. Governor Huckabee is also a staunch supporter of Woman’s Right to Know legislation. Governor Huckabee has criticized other Republicans for their stances claiming that hating but allowing abortion, stating that it’s like saying “I hate slavery, but people can go ahead and practice it.” Overall, Governor Huckabee is very consistently against abortion, in all circumstances. Mr. Huckabee takes the hardcore conservative line on abortion.

Former New York City Mayor Rudy Giuliani takes a more populist view on abortion. Giuliani has stated that he would not sign a Federal ban on abortions. He believes that the government should not be involved and that the ultimate choice should be made by a woman and her health care providers. However, the former Mayor does support the Partial Birth Abortion Ban despite opposing parental notification requirements.

Mr. Giuliani, as Mayor, supported adoption and other alternatives to abortion in an effort to decrease the abortion rate by providing other suitable alternatives to having an abortion. As President, he says he would leave individual states to decide whether or not to fund abortion. He claims he would appoint constructionist judges, but that there would be no litmus test for any nominee he put forward. Overall, Giuliani takes the stand that abortion should remain legal, but that it can be reasonably regulated. His stance fits well with the populist line, although his stance on parental notification bucks that trend.

Senator McCain is the moderate conservative on abortion. Senator McCain said he was concerned about women undergoing dangerous and illegal procedures if the culture and views surrounding abortion were not changed before it was outlawed. Senator McCain believes that abortion is acceptable in cases of rape, incest or medical necessity as determined by a medical professional, and that the benefit of the doubt should be extended to a person claiming rape or incestuous pregnancy. Senator McCain claims that he wishes for Americans to work together to make Roe v. Wade and abortions irrelevant.

Senator McCain’s voting record supports this philosophy for the most part. McCain voted to strip tax money from organizations that support or perform abortions. Senator McCain also voted in favor of the Parental Notification bill and in favor of the Partial Birth Abortion Ban. He also voted yes on attaching a criminal penalty to harming an unborn fetus while committing a crime. Despite his claim of supporting alternative to abortion and seeking to make it irrelevant, however, Senator McCain did vote against funding for sex education that includes information on other family planning options as well as contraceptives. Overall Senator McCain has a mdoerate conservative view of abortion, which is fundamentally a view against abortion.

Other candidates generally fall into camp with one of those positions. John Edwards toes the Obama Clinton line. Mitt Romney professes to being roughly in line with Huckabee, although his sincerity on that point could be legitimately questioned given his pro-choice stance as Governor. Fred Thompson is very similar to Senator McCain in his views of abortion, although he opposed the parental notification bill and does include a litmus test for judges. Representative Ron Paul is the odd-man out for both parties, in keeping with his more libertarian mindset and his voting record could reasonably place him on both sides of the fence. However, Ron Paul appears to consistently take decisions that remove the Government from the realm of sex in general, including abortion, at any point in any fashion (he voted against both abstinence only AND comprehesive sex ed, for example) although he did support the partial birth abortion ban.

Though now a Tennessee resident, when I speak of home I still focus on Missouri, especially the Ozarks where I was born and spent six formative years of childhood.

Recently I returned to the Ozarks near Fort Leonard Wood. There for three days, I faced an epiphany, an experience of both sadness and joy. Experiences that brought me closer to reality. Something happened that was unforeseen and unanticipated, something that wasn’t on my list of objectives for this trip. The result was a new personal “awareness” and sensitivity toward my own well-being.

The Ozarks surrounding Fort Leonard Wood was where I played with my uncles and cousins. We explored caves, woods, and hills. We fished, hunted and played hide and seek in the woods and in season, climbed persimmon trees and picked the fruit when it was ripe enough to eat.

The major objective of this newest visit was to reconnect with friends, family and former members of the Newburgh United Methodist Church. I wanted to strengthen relationships with those who had been significant others in my pilgrimage through life.

On this visit, I met members of this Newburgh congregation, where I had served for eight years as pastor. One startling demographic of this 40-member church concerned the educational level of its membership: highly educated and professional leaders, some 50% of the group had earned masters degrees. We had two doctors — Lute and Beth – who immigrated to the United States from South Africa.

Newburgh 40 years ago was a bustling and financially independent railroad town, but with modernization and the scraping of the steam engine the community took it “on the nose” economically. A mass exodus of jobs and workers sent the town into a decline, dropping its population to a mere 400.

While there I made friends, good friends. On this visit, I hosted a a dinner for them at the local Shoney’s. Of this original group of dedicated church members, only a handful remained. Though in their 70s and 80s now, they remained enthusiastic and healthy enough to drive the distance for a dinner/reunion with their former pastor. The, each and everyone, still served their community and church, and shared an occasional glass of wine.

My Epiphany

So this renewal, this aforementioned epiphany, began for me. I was confronted with the knowledge that two-thirds of my friends from this dynamic church had died or moved on. The camaraderie arising from this dinner gathering strengthened my bonds with and feelings for Beth, Renata, Bob, Irene, Ruth, and Gordon. We dined on an Ozark dinner of frog legs, chicken and beef dishes. Throughout this period of fellowship, I relived some of the “good old days” we had together. The presence of these good people made me feel a better person and renewed my sense of achievement. I recognized that they had made a positive contribution to my life and had enabled me to find an elevated sense of self-esteem.

In this area, this county near Fort Leonard Wood, I still have a few aunts, uncles and cousins. Their number has dwindled since my last visit. The bell has “tolled” for a dozen of them in the last eight years. These family members from my mother’s side were supporting and accepting of me and contributed to our well-being; my mother was a single parent at age 18. These precious relatives helped raise me in an environment of loving care. Over the years, I’ve continued to express my gratitude, verbally, and with gifts, or frequent phone calls, for their daily positive confirmations of my value in childhood, especially those first six years.

Time has taken an ignominious toll on them; they are widows and widowers, having outlived their spouses. they are receiving extended medical care for a variety of injuries and diseases. Uncle Frank is 91, in overall good health but confined to an assisted living facility. There are symptoms of diseases, signs of the ravages of dementia and stroke. Individually they have had to surrender their self-determination and physical mobility to the demands of aging. For them, driving a car is no longer a comfort activity in life.

But back to my epiphany. As a result of this renewal with my friends and family, I have experienced a wake-up call. I am now one of the older generation in our family, and in 2008, I could become one of the few survivors of our clan. Thisfamily visit introduced me anew to my own mortality. Tearfully, I say that I am going to miss my uncles and aunts upon their demise. A comfort for me, though, will be my recognition that I “loved them now” while they are still with me. (Presbytarian hymn).

Mullings and Musings

A source of inspiration and spiritual boldness as I begin my 7th decade s the book Mullings and Musings by Clarksville’s own Charlotte Marshall, in which she gives comforting advice from decades of life through her gift for story telling. In one emotional and insightful story, she says:

“Then the purposelessness and fragility of life bound together as an ephemeral gift camae into sharp fears as to make me weep. Why have I been so dull, so unaware, so taking-for-granted the treasures given me? Never again will any of life be taken cavalierly.”

After my abbreviated time with my family in the Ozarks, I’ve returned to Clarksville withb a renewed sense of dedication “to set my house in order.” I have been more generous and have vowed not to be so cavalier in daily living.

A few concluding observations from this experience: Such confrontations are not joyful happenings, but are ones I can, with God’s help, use productively in the time I have remaining. Being Methodist, In hope to live as long as our founder, Rev. John Wesley, who left this earthly test at 86 years of age.

Also, as we say in the Ozarks, “I;m not allowing any grass to grow under my feet.” I’m busy sharing, doing good, and planning for my future, with it’s five or 20 years.

At the beginning of this new year, I am appreciative of my heritage and lineage. I am grateful for my family, especially the uncles and aunts that immeasurably contributed to my life, not with money but with affection and acceptance.

Happy New Year to all.

Author’s Note: Mullings and Musings is available at Trinity Episcopal Church for $10. It is an excellent gift for any and all occasions and a tool for anyone interested in spiritual growth.

The first item on my list is my family. I have a loving partner of over two years. Christian is more than I could ever want in a partner. He’s my best friend through the good times, he’s my rock through the bad times, and he’s my shoulder to cry on through the sad times. Most people wouldn’t notice at first glance, but he’s the most sensitive and caring person I’ve ever known, and I love him more than he’ll ever know. His cousin John who lives with us is one of the greatest men I’ve ever had the privilege to know. He’s one of those rare souls you meet who you can always count on to get you through whatever is going on in life.

Christian’s family has taken me in and become an extension of my own family. They are outstanding people who are supportive and loving without boundaries. My own family has always been a big part of my life. They’re boisterous, caring, funny, compassionate, crazy, and supportive and I wouldn’t trade them for anything in the world. They’ve taught me more than values and morals. They’ve taught me about living, loving, and laughing.

The next item on my list is my friends. I don’t know what I’d do without them. They’ve been with me throughout everything, always there when I need them, and some of the greatest people I know. I believe firmly that family is more than just the people you share a biological connection to. These people are a big part of my family.

The final item on my list is my life that God has given me. I have a home, a partner, family and friends, a job that pays the bills, and a few extra dollars in my wallet. I’m a lucky man. I’m breathing, walking, and talking so I really can’t complain too much. I have most of what I want, and more than enough of what I need. I couldn’t ask for much more in life.

I hope that sometime between the shopping, cooking, and commotion this year that you’ll stop, if only for a moment, to remember all that you’re thankful for. Let the people in your life know just how much they mean to you. Take time to call those people you don’t see often and tell them how thankful you are that they’re a part of your life. Take notice of what you have and what you really need to survive. Chances are, you’ll find that you’ve got an abundance of love, laughter, and life. Remember to share it with those people who are a part of your life. Happy holidays, from my home to yours!

Regards,

Fifteen years ago, I found Jesse a fabulous apartment in Deerfield, Massachusetts, an oddly-shaped studio in the upper tier of an even more oddly-shaped ultra-modern house, set in the woods on the edge of small cliff, decks extending out to the edge with a view of the Pioneer Valley. Birdfeeders everywhere. An occasional misguided moose in the cow pasture several hundred feet below. Steep dirt driveway that made icy winter driving “interesting.” But after seven years, ownership, and zoning shifted and that apartment was suddenly a thing of the past.

Then came Granby, Massachusetts, and a comfy one bedroom in the basement of private home at the end of another long, frost-heaved, mud-puddled dirt driveway, past a stand of trees that marked the local Christmas Tree Farm. Incongruous Cape Cod Fishing huts and colorful marine buoys marked the otherwise hidden private driveway. Nice place, nice owners. Retired. ‘Have trailer, will travel’ people. Double French doors opened into the bedroom in this unit, and a wall-to-wall stone fireplace sealed the deal. How good can it get for under $500 a month?

But all things change, and eight years later the retirees are reclaiming the entire house. And while there was no rush, no pressure to vacate, no one wants to move during winter in New England. And Jesse will be on the move again.

Enter Serendipity. The frantic phone call, his swoosh of breath released when I said I would come help, the intensive juggling of schedules, and the realization that I had five days to make it all better in New England. The bonus realization that I would be in a New England flamboyant, resplendant in the brilliant mantle of Autumn, at a time that coincides with an art show I didn’t think I would get to see by an artist whose work I desperately wanted to see again, live. Real. Touchable. And there would be dinner with friends I haven’t seen in almost a year.

It didn’t take long to pack.

I settled in Friday night, and on Saturday morning went to visit another friend, this one of 55 years standing, who also has a house with a longstanding vacancy. I went to B’s store, cushioned myself in a comfy recliner opposite him, and we chatted.

I have the perfect tenant for you, I said. There. It was on the table. B knew Jesse. Jesse knew B. I knew both men better than either cared to admit. The potential landlord wanted no hassles and no aggravation and the minimalist rent on time. The potential tenant wanted no hassles, no aggravation and is meticulous about paying all his bills on or before time. The potential landlord bought the paint for the front room, and the potential tenant is willing to paint. And shovel in winter. Both were antsy about the shift into a landlord/tenant relationship, both panicked, both “slept on it” — it is now a done deal.

It’s a city apartment in one of those “community within a community” districts. It’s a second floor, small, with oddly shaped ceilings and a few odd nooks and crannies. Sunny. Clean. Cheap. Convenient. Near both of Jesse’s jobs, with a room that will be his writing center, the place where the revisions of his 500-page manuscript will happen. And new work will emerge.

It’s different from the kinds of places I usually find for him, but Jesse’s work is now in another county — the one he’s moving to. He can bring his security clearances to work at job #1 in less than 20 minutes, and his booming radio voice to work at job #2 in just five minutes.

And so on Sunday afternoon, I found myself in Grossman’s (the hometown “surplus” version of Lowe’s or Home Depot) buying textured paint and brushes, and pricing shower surrounds and square shower mats. And still later, I found myself lying on the second floor bathroom tile, pipe wrench in hand, checking out a water line leak that sprang up when B and I turned the shutoffs to ‘open.’ Phase Two: Take apart the toilet to replace gaskets and seals.

In this neighborhood, this place of my life, I remembered an Easter Sunday when, after a beautiful ham dinner at the perennially elegant table in B’s main house, I found myself lying on the floor, under the sink, pipe wrench in hand, looking up at a balky, tempermental garbage disposal, a piece of machinery that I was determined would not get the best of me. My best friend Robin, visiting from Vermont, stood close beside me, passing me the right tools with surgical precision. My mom, in her elegance holiday garb and the onset of her dementia, stood proudly beside me, pointing down at my prone body on the floor, telling everyone, “that’s my girl.” Difference was, though, that getting up from the floor now takes longer, requires assistance and is more painful than it used to be.

But with the paint, brushes and rollers bought, I moved on to the rest of the list: old utilities to be turned off, new utilities to be signed for (new companies in a new county), phone and ISP changes to be ordered. The old apartment is packed; a clean-up crew removed the trash and discarded furniture (goodbye Futon!). The movers — everyone involved agreed we are past the point of moving ourselves — are scheduled to shift the balance over the county line in just a few days.

All this accomplished while Jesse was in Buffalo, en route to Cleveland then back to Buffalo, comforted to know I did the job he asked of me quickly, efficiently, precisely, and all he has to do is paint (he’s a former store display designer) and decide where to plug in his laptop.

I now had the bonus, the gift of time in the best of company. B, my old friend Jean (at left), and I grew up together, three houses in a row, three friends since baby-hood. Spiced with addition of new friends who have entered our circle. I brought a pork roast to B’s, and went to work on the meal I am noted for: roast pork infused with fresh crushed garlic, and oven-browned garlic potatoes. Bill made the perfect stuffed peppers for the vegetarians in our group.

We spent an evening settled into wild conversation, exuberant laughter, bits and pieces of nostalgia, and our favorite music, all playing out in a living room I all but grew up in, with a bookcase-framed fireplace that my dad helped B’s dad build too many years ago to count. Too warm for a fire; candles were a great substitute.

I’m already home again, before the real move happens later this week; I am back in the warmer climate of Tennessee, missing the slushy frost I’ve been scraping off windshields here each morning, missing the pile of frost-crisped harvested apples at the edge of the drive, missing the icy bit of west frosty grass on my bare feet when I photographed the piles of deer-bait: mushy apples fermenting at the base of tree.

But the strands of the web I have woven will play out, linking people and places in a way that benefit all of us. For our network is small, growing smaller, and the people we can count on most are these friends who are, in truth, family. Not blood family, because that can sometimes be over-rated. We are family of the heart.