Topic: The Mummy

This “Mummy” should have stayed buried

August 12, 2008 |

Before I spend any significant time in pontificating on just how bad The Mummy: Tomb of the Dragon Emperor (hereafter Mummy 3) really is, I should confess that I have a certain amount of fanboy affection for Brendan Fraser. It’s hard for me to not like one of his films. Alas, in the case of Mummy 3, the film really borders on a level of asinine that makes for downright painful viewing. Even my fondness for Fraser’s presence on the big screen doesn’t save this atrocity from the depths of total celluloid depravity.

Director Rob Cohen takes over the reins from Stephen Sommers, who helmed the first two films. Cohen’s style of storytelling clearly wanted to capture some of the apparent nostalgia of the first two Mummy films. Only there’s one big problem – it’s been a mere seven years since the last one, and the first two films really weren’t all that great to begin with.

I’ve long had a personal policy of spoiler-free reviews, but I’ll have to make an exception in this case because it’s just THAT bad. Try to imagine, if you can, a scene where massive, overly-animated Yeti pounce on the villains only to kick one of the poor heavies over a roof in an impromptu football field goal, with the obligatory referee’s hand sign. If you think such a scene is an exercise of brilliant humor, then there’s not really much hope for you—you’ll probably love this movie. The rest of us will roll our eyes nearly out of their sockets. «Read the rest of this article»

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