Written by U.S. Army Capt. Kenneth A. Stewart
17th Public Affairs Detachment
Paktya, Afghanistan – They did not play, ‘Love is a battlefield,’ at their wedding, but it would have been appropriate.
U.S. Army civilians, Tony Humphreys of Pittsburgh, and Lisette Bonano of Tampa, FL, participated in a marriage commitment ceremony at Forward Operating Base Lightning February 7th.
The commitment ceremony was held in lieu of a wedding because coalition chaplains cannot perform weddings in Afghanistan.
The two met in Afghanistan after they retired. Humphreys is a retired U.S. Army command sergeant major. Bonano is a retired lieutenant colonel who worked with a provincial reconstruction team in Iraq before retiring last year.
Bonano smiles as she remembers her first encounters with Humphreys.
“He was always trying to waive at me and get my attention, but I just ignored him and walked away,” said Bonano. “I avoided him like the plague.”
Humphreys had been working at FOB Lightning for about two years when he first encountered his future wife.
“A van pulled up and I saw this lady,” said Humphreys. “I felt something, but I still had to maintain my professionalism.”
Humphreys insists he and Bonano have been entirely professional despite their obvious affection for each other.
It wasn’t until Bonano left Afghanistan that things began to happen between the couple.
Humphreys had a friend ask Bonano to come to his office to receive a coin; supposedly, the coin was a reward Bonano for her good work at the FOB.
“He just wanted an excuse to touch my hand,” said Bonano. “I have brothers; I knew what was going on.”
Humphreys and Bonano began to correspond by e-mail. They found that they had a great deal in common. They both have adult children, they are both of Italian descent, and they are both deeply committed Christians.
After a short stay in the states, Bonano decided to return to Afghanistan. She believes it was more than just a career decision. She felt compelled to return.
“We were drawn together by a shared faith in a difficult place,” said Bonano. “I know (Humphreys) was sent to me by God.”
U.S. Army Chaplain (Capt.) Karen Hallet of Vernon, NJ, presided over the commitment ceremony. She, like Bonano, recognized the hand of a higher power in the couple’s union.
“God is the author of love … God can lead us to our life companion,” said Hallet. “God found this couple in a little FOB in Afghanistan.”
Humphreys becomes wistful when he thinks of the odd circumstances that brought him and Bonano together.
“It took me 25 years to find her, but I found her here in Afghanistan,” said Humphreys. “I am a blessed man.”
Conditions at FOB Lightning are tough, but for at least one couple, this unassuming corner of Afghanistan will be the place, ‘we first met.’
