34.5 F
Clarksville
Thursday, March 28, 2024
HomeSpiritualityWho Will Cast the First Stone?

Who Will Cast the First Stone?

First StoneClarksville, TN – I don’t often judge people. But there are some times when you can bet I am: When you fail to wash your hands in a public restroom (I could write a whole blog just on that). When you are rude to your waiter or waitress. When you treat your spouse or child like dirt. I am probably judging you.

Don’t act like you never judge me. You might judge the fact that I drive a gas guzzler, or how I dress, how I parent, that I was divorced, that I am a Christian, or that I am a Christian after years of sinning. We all, at times, pass a certain degree of judgment on one another, but boy do we hate when someone judges us! Then we judge them for judging us. Wow. What an awesome bunch we are.

But here’s a misconception I feel the need to address: People get irate when they hear Christians “judging” other people. They are quick to remind everyone that Christ did not judge others. Remember he said, “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.” But that is not the entire story. Next, he told the adulterous woman, “Then neither do I condemn you,” Jesus declared. “Go now and leave your life of sin.” God hates sin.

I think people are confusing two very different terms: Judging and accountability.

Judging is sitting in a position of authority and making a decision on the worthiness and fate of another human. Judging other people is often accompanied by gossip, hatefulness, jockeying for power, and propping ourselves up for being “less sinful.” Judging is deciding where someone will spend their eternity when only God knows their heart. “There is only one lawgiver and judge, he who is able to save and to destroy. But who are you to judge your neighbor?” (James 4:12)

Here is what judging isn’t: It isn’t humbly stating that someone else’s sin has hurt us, disappointed us or affected our hope. It isn’t genuinely praying for someone who has sinned. It isn’t talking about our hurt, loss or disappointment with others who have godly and pure intentions, to grieve, cry out to God, and begin the healing process.

Accountability is what Christians do for one another. Sometimes we directly invite someone to hold us accountable. We may ask a friend or family member to help us to cuss less, to exercise more, to watch our temper or to be more honest. We also have indirect accountability in our lives. This comes in the form of our Christian peers: people we worship with, people we have Bible study with, or people we serve with. We haven’t implicitly asked them to watch our every move, but if they care about us, they will talk to us when they see us sinning. (Galatians 6:1-2) They don’t stop loving us, but they want to help us stop sinning for our own sake.

Here is what accountability isn’t: It isn’t speculating as to the “real truth.” It isn’t offering up a prayer request as an excuse to talk about other people’s private business.  It isn’t talking about people’s sins with others who barely know them, don’t love them, and can’t do a single thing about it. And it certainly is not telling them to wander out into the wilderness and spend their remaining days alone. But it also is not telling them their sins are okay by sheltering them from any or all consequences and enabling them to keep on sinning.

Our relationship with God is not private or in a vacuum. We will spend countless hours crying out to him alone. But our relationship with God is evident in our attitude, how we treat our kids, how we love and respect our spouse, how we treat strangers, how we speak, how we act, how we spend our money, how we care for our bodies, how we think, and every single aspect of our lives and relationships.

Christians never, ever do life alone. Our sin hurts others. And people who love us, and love God more, have earned the right to speak to us in love and pray for our recovery and fortification.”Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.” (James 5:16)

I have hurt countless people with my sins. I have lost relationships because of my sinful, selfish choices. I still regret some of the choices I have made, although I have come to a place of forgiving myself.  But although I may have gotten what I deserved at the time, I pray fervently that if I stumble in my walk, and I hurt those who care about me, that they will wrap their arms around me, and say, “You were wrong, I love you. Go and sin no more.”

Kris Wolfe
Kris Wolfehttp://www.morningglorydevo.com/
Kris Wolfe is a Christian, wife and mother. Kris is a freelance writer who focuses on spiritual and practical encouragement. Kris also writes lessons for small group purposes for churches and is a small group coach.  Kris has a master’s degree in Biblical Counseling from Luther Rice University and Seminary and is a listed TN Supreme Court Rule 31 Mediator. Kris covers topics such as dating, marriage, parenting, divorce, post-divorce recovery, and the blended family. Read more from Kris Wolfe at MorningGloryDevo.com or follow on Twitter @MrsKrisWolfe
RELATED ARTICLES

Latest Articles